How to Help Your Child Find True Happiness
We love to make our kids happy. Nothing can replace the feeling we get when they smile and say, “Thank you, Daddy, that was the best time, ever.” Whatever it takes—from candy to tablets to trips overseas—we spend it. When they’re happy, we’re happy.
As they get older, our culture teaches them what will bring happiness. Some pick up on the message of clothes, body image, sexual experience, or the latest technology. For others, it’s high grades, the top of the game, a good school, and the high salary job. But does what they accomplish or buy make them truly happy
The professor tries to teach students how to lead a happier, more satisfying life. Students think that high grades, the right internship and a good-paying job will satisfy them. But the professor believes these things do not increase happiness at all. Would more than half of undergraduates seek mental health care if their accomplishments could make them happy?
One student said, “A lot of us are anxious, stressed, unhappy, numb. The fact that a class like this has such large interest speaks to how tired students are of numbing their emotions… so they can focus on their work, the next step, the next accomplishment.”
Here are three biblical truths our kids need to hear from us:
1. Only Jesus can give you real happiness that lasts forever.
True happiness is not an event or a feeling. True happiness is a person—the person of Jesus. Birthday cake, Christmas gifts, and vacations are fun. We enjoy and thank God for the good things he gives us. But cake goes stale. Toys break. Even the best vacations end. Even the best gift cannot make our hearts happy forever. God, the Giver of every good gift, gives us things to turn our hearts to him. The stronger, higher truth for our children is that Jesus is our real happiness. Only the joy of Jesus lasts forever.
2. Only Jesus gives real satisfaction.
We may have appetites for money, friends, talents, looking good, and being smart. But our appetites always leave us hungry. Only Jesus truly satisfies. Jesus, the Bread of Life fills us up with his life. Jesus is the true manna (John 6:31-35). Bread fills our stomachs, but Jesus fills our hearts.
Money, good grades, a place on the team, or a part in the play are good. But let’s tell our kids that these things cannot fill our hearts with real and lasting happiness. As you read God’s Word together and pray, ask your Heavenly Father to help you taste the sweetness of Jesus.
3. True happiness is yours when you give your life to Jesus.
Our kids think that life is all about them. From early on, their goal in life is to know themselves and have fun. Surely a desire true of all good parents is for their children to achieve their potential. But the truth is, God made us to love him and to live for him. Our lives will never be right until we live for him. When we try to live for ourselves, it’s like trying to put shoes on our hands; it doesn’t work. Our kids were made for God. Life with him is truly happy. God’s purpose for our lives reveals the smallness of our dreams. God creates us to know him, love him and glorify him. Success in school, a job, and friendships are important, but these things will never make us truly happy. Jesus came to give his life to us. Now we can give our lives to him: our hands, feet, eyes, tongue, mind, and heart.
The way forward
How can we set our kids up for real lasting satisfying happiness? Attend church regularly. Model biblical principles. Watch for opportunities to share gospel truth in ordinary conversations with your child. Pray!
But this is worth remembering. As I wrote above, the number one activity with the most lasting impact on a child’s life is Bible reading. The Bible points us to Jesus—the One who imparts lasting and satisfying happiness. It’s a parents’ privilege to teach the truths of God to their child. How are your goals for your children preparing them for true happiness? Will you ask God to help your family engage regularly with the Bible?
Notes:
1 David Shimer, "Yale’s Most Popular Class Ever: Happiness," New York Times, Jan. 26, 2018.
2 Jana Magruder, Nothing Less: Engaging Kids in a Lifetime of Faith Nashville: Lifeway, 2017.