3 Bold Prayers for Our Children
If you are a parent and you find that your kids consume the majority of your prayer time, that’s not a bad thing. One of God’s gracious gifts to Christian parents is that we can approach the throne of grace with confidence to intercede for our children.
Prayer requires humility, submission, and trust, and many of our prayers will probably be reactionary. We cry out for help in a moment of chaos or before discipline, just asking God what we are to do. Other times, we may pray in tears for a wayward child making negative, life-altering choices.
The question I’ve asked myself recently is, “Are my prayers for my children too small?” If I were to rephrase that question more positively, it would be, “What big and bold prayers can I pray for my children?” It’s been said that when we pray, we should be careful what we ask because God may just do it. The following prayers are ones that I want to pray, and yet often struggle to pray, because in my finite mind and in my desire for safety and comfort for myself and my children, I know these prayers may lead to anything but those desires. These prayers may be answered in a way that is incredibly painful for a time. Yet, while these may be dangerous prayers to pray, they are vital for not only our children but our hearts as well.
Bold Prayer #1: “Lord, do whatever it takes to bring them to you in repentance and faith.”
If we are honest as parents, we spend a significant amount of time praying for our kids’ health, safety, and protection. We don’t want our children to suffer, no one does. We don’t want our kids to experience hardships, especially ones we had to go through, and so we pray to that end. And while it isn’t wrong to pray thise things, maybe we need to add another prayer into the mix. A healthy, safe, and comfortable life apart from Jesus Christ is ultimately deadly for our children’s souls. So, instead, we should be praying that the Lord would use any means necessary to draw our children to himself, be it suffering or some other wake-up call. This is a bold prayer, because if the Lord answers it, it may mean difficult and even terrible things for our children or us—at least for a season.
In Luke 15, Jesus tells the story commonly referred to as the parable of the prodigal son. The younger son in the story has a whatever-it-takes moment when after squandering the inheritance his father gave him, he is eating among the pigs. Jesus then says, “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death!” (v. 17).
As parents, we hope that our children will believe in Jesus early and never know a time where they didn’t. We don’t want them to experience extended periods of rebellion, severe doubt, etc. But the truth is that not everyone will have this story, so we pray “whatever it takes.” And we know this will almost certainly result in pain or in a crisis moment. One author I was recently reading wrote that he keeps a list of every man he knows who came to faith in Jesus after turning thirty. On that list, all but one of them came to Christ due to a crisis moment such as a job loss, divorce, or the death of a loved one.
That’s a stark reminder that when we pray “whatever it takes,” we’re praying with an eternal perspective and not an earthly one.
Bold Prayer #2: “Lord, make it obvious if they are hot or cold when it comes to their faith.”
One of the scariest passages to read in the New Testament is Jesus’s words during the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 7. “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’ (vv. 21–23).
The second bold prayer is that God would make it obvious to us that our children love Jesus, that we would see clearly whether they are pursuing him or are rejecting him and his Word. Why would we want children who are either hot or cold? Because we don’t want lukewarm, go through the motions, cultural Christians who will give a checklist religion to Jesus and then hear, “I never knew you.” As our children grow up and enter the teenage years, we want God to make it clear to us where they are so that we know how to best bring the truth of the gospel to them. Do we need to evangelize them, give them evidence for our faith, and challenge them to see the sandy foundation they are building their life upon, or can we encourage them in the gospel, challenge them to read God’s Word, and teach them to obey everything Jesus commanded?
When we pray “make it obvious,” we are praying that God would help us to discern the hearts of our children.
Bold Prayer #3: “Lord, call them to go wherever you want no matter the cost.”
“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth” (Psalm 127:3–4). Our children are gifts from the Lord that we are called to steward well. We’re called to raise them up and send them out into the world. The earlier we come to terms with this, the easier it will be to pray for God to take our children wherever he wants to take them instead of trying to hold onto them. The whole goal of parenting is to send our God-glorifying, Jesus-loving, and Spirit-filled children into the world to make much of Jesus. We know that part of Jesus's calling is to count the cost of discipleship and deny ourselves, take up our cross, and follow him (Mark 8:34). When our children believe, we must make sure they understand the cost of discipleship as well, both in our words and our actions.
Praying, “call them to go wherever you want”, may mean that our children go overseas, serve in an underprivileged and dangerous neighborhood, choose a profession that doesn’t pay as much but allows them to serve in the church, or make huge sacrifices that we would never choose for them.
When we pray “call them to go wherever you want,” we entrust our children to their good Father and his plans.
After reading these prayers, you may be like me and need to follow-up with another prayer—a simple cry to God, “Lord, give me the guts to trust you and to pray these bold prayers.” These prayers are not easy to pray. Commit to praying big and bold prayers for your children. Pursue Jesus, be faithful in your parenting, and trust God with the results.